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Session 5 Marital Counseling.
I gave my arm an experimental tug and her fingers bit into my flesh as she yanked me back. I debated punching her, I really honest to god did. So Michael could throw me around like a ragdoll, along with almost every other person in the hall. But Anne, she was my sister and she really wasn't that much taller than me. I doubted she weighed anymore than I did.
Her eyes narrowed as if she knew exactly what I thinking. "You raise your hand to me little brother and I'll show exactly what got me into this gang in the first place."
I laughed at her. "Do your worse." I poked her in the shoulder. "You remember who I'm sharing a room with? You don't exactly compare big sister." The latter words came out in a hiss. "Get off me."
I could see her hand straining above her belt knife. I wasn't scared; she wouldn't pull it on me. I was sure of that at least. She let me go suddenly and gave me a solid push in the chest. I very nearly fell on my arse. "I don't need this shit." She snapped. "Piss off back to Michael then, but don't say I didn't try."
I didn't answer her; I thought I might end up laughing in her face. Jesus, I want out. The thought came out of nowhere, shocking me with it ferocity. I mean, of course I wanted out, who wouldn't? I was surrounded by murderers. The point was though that I wanted out, out of the tomb, out of the dark and cold. I wanted to be in the light, I wanted fresh air and the freedom to go where I wanted. Granted I'd never really had any of those things before, the air smelled like refuge and mould and I tended to keep out of the sun to avoid detection. It was better than what I had now though, of that I was sure.
It was still daylight. There weren't that many gang members up and about yet. I doubted there was much chance of me running into Jonnie so early in the day. I chanced a short crossing across the hall, entering into unchartered territory as I inched closer to the one of the few exists that led out of the hall.
I reached the door before a light arm wrapped around my waist. I jumped but it was only Louie. She smiled at me, casually lifting my arm until it draped her slender shoulders. "Whatcha doin kiddo?" she asked me.
"Nothing." I answered immediately.
She frowned at me. "You know what will happen if you go out there Conner? You're free game. You won't get ten feet before someone rips into you. Believe me when I say leaving is not a good idea."
"I wasn't going to." The lie hung heavily in the air between us. "Jesus Louie-"
Her hand slapped across my mouth, smothering my words. "Cut it out." She snapped. "You know what that word does to them. Now you listen to me Conner, if you try anything like that again and I'll have to stop taking you out with me. I don't want to but I'll not be the one ripped apart by Michael because you decided to do a bunk. "
I turned my face away, pulling away from her hand. "I just wanted to see the sun." I mumbled.
Her face softened very slightly. "Things are different now Conner, you need to get used to that. The Sun is no longer a part of your life."
It seemed to me that was an incredibly stupid thing to say. I was a person for Christ sake! How was I supposed to just accept that I would spend the rest of my life in a pit?
"I'm being serious Conner." She warned. "I'll tell him."
"Tell him what?" I demanded. "That I wondered near a door!"
She grabbed my arm and started dragging me through the hall, back towards Michael's room. "Do not take that tone with me child. People see you talking to me like that and they'll think I'm getting soft. You'll force me to act and neither of us wants that."
I closed my mouth firmly and refused to look at her. I felt betrayed and stupid. I should have known better, even though she was my friend she was still one of them. I needed to remember that in another life, had our paths crossed, she probably would not have hesitated to kill me.
"Do you ever go out in the light Louie?" I asked her, surprising myself when I asked her.
"What do I care for the light?" She asked quietly, her hands clenching i