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Man thinks of secretary while making love to spouse.

(A photoshoot for a wedding magazine - if memory holds - and it's definitely more progressive than most.) I'm not sure that it was inspired by my suggestion; I sent the email something like four and a half months ago. It could be coincidence. But really that's besides the point; the point is that I see the need for variety, and not only want it but went out of my way to request it.

(Besides the point? Beside the point? Both are correct, yes?)

Now, moving on to whether or not it's selfish to ask my girlfriend or wife to only have sex with black men, with the exception of myself. All of her partners should be approved by both of us; we will both have veto power. The idea isn't to give her men that only I will enjoy watching her have sex with, of course she needs to desire them too. But given my rigid voyeuristic preferences, I wouldn't enjoy watching her have sex with men that aren't black. And given that it's meant to be a shared experience, she won't be having sex with men unless I'm watching; it's for both of us, all the time.

Whatever role she wants me to play, I'm more than happy to fulfill that role; watching respectfully from a distance (not that far, not, like, through binoculars or anything. But I've seen some porn when the cuck is, like, looming over them. I saw one in which he was perched on a stool, looming over them like a bird of prey. That shit's just creepy; dude, take a step back. Just, give them a bit of room, yeah?) If she wants me to help out then I'm there for her.

[It would be really fun, I think, to give her competing attention. I will provide the gentle ministrations, lying underneath her and kissing her thighs, stroking her side, kissing her lips, attending her clit. And he can be behind her, providing the fucking; pounding her, stretching her out, pulling her hair and spanking her. I want to see how she reacts to that; I think she'd have an amazing orgasm when receiving that kind of competing sensations.

SIDENOTE: I don't want her to "ruin" her pussy. Return it in roughly the same shape you got it in, dude. That's not sexy. It also smacks more than a little of sexism, as if she having sex ruins her, like used gum. Maybe I'm being overly sensitive here... but even if I am, I can't help that it's not sexy to me.]

If she occasionally wants to tease me, to take on a more assertive role, that's great too. I want it all; I want her to share with me how she's feeling, to share with me how much she loves me for sharing her, for wanting to share her. But I also want her to tease me, to have fun with the fact that I - we - are pervs. And if she wants to be more of a bitch like in cuckold porn, that's cool too... occasionally... maybe. I will know it's coming from a place of love, and that she's having fun. Which is important to me. But I'm not gonna lie, if it becomes a regular thing, I may question how much of it is simply teasing.

You may argue that that shows that I'm not ready for this relationship, but I don't think that it *would* become a problem. If I'm with the right woman, it wouldn't. If I'm with the right woman, and we don't *need* another in our relationship, then she wouldn't do that.

Perhaps looked at in a certain light it's selfish to demand I'm always there. But she should want me to be there; I want her to enjoy herself with him, but she should enjoy herself even more knowing that I'm getting off on watching her. Her pleasure will enhance my own, as mine will enhance hers.

If she wants it to be about me as much as she wants it about her - as I want it to be about her as much as I want it to be about me - then she won't have a problem with my requirement.

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